A Sad Day

The Cat is on the Bastard List. Its a sad day when one of your own flesh and blood (so to speak) comes onto that list. But it is justified. Tripped over the little cow on Friday and broke my frackin' little toe. Missed a day's work at the rugby match - £ 8.00 an hour! - 'cos I couldn't walk on it! Felt like suing the little mare but she's an empty pocket - as they say in Ally McBeal.

Hobbled to Casualty on Saturday. Doctor said she wasn't even going to x-ray it, she could see I'd broken it. Cow! I would have loved an x-ray. I don't get many pleasures in life, was a little x-ray too much to ask? It seemed it was. Bloody NHS - no wonder they've gone to the dogs!

So it was a shit weekend. Couldn't go out because I couldn't even get my foot in the shoe. And does The Cat show any sign of remorse? Does she hell? Well, thanks for wrecking my life, Rose! You give them the best years of your life and they throw it right back at you....

Husband off sick today. Told me to cancel all viewings with the Estate Agents. Well, what about me on Saturday then? Pale and weak from Casualty but no, they all had to troop round then! I mean Sod Me, that was alright wasn't it. I could lay down when their office closed at 5 o'clock. One off-day for Husband and we close the shutters right down!!

Hacked off. Gonna make a big sandwich!

On a lighter note....

While we are waiting for a specialist's results, we are making the best fuss of Rose that we can. Not that we didn't before!

But a light through the dark cloud has broken through. Son was the only year 5 picked to play for the school football team . The rest are year 6's. They played a match yesterday and although they got slaughtered - 5-1 - Son scored their only goal. What a football boy!

Why would he remotely care that he's in the second maths group now? And he acknowledges that there are better footballers than him. So i don't even have to go through that! We have all learnt this painful lesson that there is always someone better than us. I'm just glad he 's learnt it young.

but what i don't get is, is he genuinely good? or is it just sheer lack of competition? all footballers look like Pele or George best to me. they kick a football don't they?

Life's so strange, how it deals out sadness and joy.

One of Life's blows

Not a good day today. Pissed down with rain, couldn't get anyone to have Son after football, what has happened to his popularity all of a sudden?, went to my Mum's and my bloody brother was there and now i've had a phone call from the Vet. The results have come back from the Lab and they dedect white cells, possibly luekemia. Maybe a tumour.

Why oh why does life give with one hand and take away with the other???

Vet seemed surprised Rose had changed for the better and wants me to bring her in on wednesday. He's a good bloke actually because he's not normally there on wednesday mornings but has rearranged things so he can still treat Rose. This has all become very urgent too quickly. Hate vets normally. This is because of Allastair, the vet on the Archers, he is such a miserable spineless bastard. And somehow this irrational and unprovoked hate has spread to real vets. Not fair really. But then its not fair about my cat either.

What in Gods name am i going to tell the kids? They know she's ill. But what good would it do to let them know how much? My poor rabbit George had a terrible tumour and despite the best vet care possible, he still suffered. Don't want Rosie to go through that.

Have told Husband in secret. He loves Rose passionately. And the kids heard me on the phone to the Vet apparently so Husband told them it was a stomach infection. Didn't want to lie but......

Oh Lordy......

Good News - I think....

The Pancreas. Ignorant cow, i didn't even know where that was. The vet had to tell me. But he's waiting a further blood test from the lab before he can be sure. But he reckons that her pancreas is causing her pain.

I know this is awful but i hope it was the pain that turned her against us like this. Not a psychological thing. Not something like a dementia that my Dad got. I know that sounds stupid but i was convinced something terrible was going on in her head. At least if she is treated medically, she could love us again. We still love her.

Vet gave her a huge antibiotic injection and she slept non-stop that afternoon. When she finally woke, she was a bit like her old self again. Hassling me when i tried to have a lie-in today, purring for England, she was a bit like my old Furry Purry again. So fingers crossed. The Vet was very unhappy about her behaviour but lets hope its a medical thing that can be taken care of.

Meanwhile, had to work at the rugby match this saturday. On the tills! 9 am till 7 pm. God, was i miserable! And then today, trotting off to Highgate to Lauderdale house to see my friend sing. He was supporting someone in a concert and he has a beautiful voice but all i wanted to do was go home and be with Rosie. Also, North London seems another world now. When I lived in Enfield, i was always going up Hampstead and that Jacksons Lane centre to see productions and that. Its funny how you change. Its funny how you feel like a foreigner when you live in the West of London.

Talking of that, Westfield has opened up its doors and Shepherds Bush so tantilisingly close. I mean i know Woman's Hour has a point - its a new centre with the same old shops but I have never been to a proper shopping place before. Not Brent Cross nor Lakeside nor Bluewater. I've always had Hounslow and Kingston to keep me warm but now i'm curious. i've always wanted to go that Metro centre , the one Viz magazine talk about. But it sounds like this one is even bigger. God, i hope its not like Fountaingate, like the one in Kath and Kim.

Beating the Zombies

To overcome my stupid irrational fear of zombies, what was the best thing i could do? yes, thats right. Have a birthday party with a load of 10 year old boys. An hour with them would make me gladly welcome any passing Undead. Although it would have to be a pretty foolhardy zombie to enter a room full of wild boys.

Son was 10 in October. So this Sunday we had a swimming party at the local pool. This seemed the best idea, an hour in the pool would exhaust any boy so I planned out the sitdown meal up in the party room with confidence. You didn't think i was going to get in the water, did you???

Exhausted, my right eye! They were up for more action the minute they'd changed. And trying to get the little buggers to sit down to cheese footballs and limp sandwiches, i tell you! It was 5C all over again but without Bernard Hedges and Potter. Although even Doris Ewell would be hard put to keep this little lot in order! The naughtiest boy suggested a food fight immediately. Husband put a complete stop to that one! Although, confidentially, if He hadn't been there, i would have let it go ahead. It would keep them occupied . And I would clean it up afterwards of course.

The way these kids speak to you! Honestly! Some kid yelled at me, I want more sausage rolls now! Pardon??? I blared at the little sod. Er - please, he mumbled. And another kid spoke to me like dirt and i shouted right at the little git. The annoying thing is they know how to behave really. I know there are some kids who have been dragged up and really don't know how to speak to people. But not these over-privilleged little bastards. But i mean really, would you have spoken to an adult like that? I mean i don't want my own childhood back, where i had to be seen but not heard, but kids are encouraged far too much to mouth off these days.

This is a disaster! Son pipes up as they fall on each other all around the room. But personally i didn't think it was. They seemed to be having the time of their lives!

And now for a really sad moment. Rose my cat. She's a beautiful creature and has given us joy for the last two and a half years. But lately she's been growling at us and she scratched me so badly today. And she's been hissing a lot too. We're almost frightened of her and we can't be under siege in our own home. Will take her to the vet on friday morning and see what she says. We don't want to lose her, she's a part of us. But we can't go on like this.

I know its wicked. But i would rather she was put down. I can't bear the thought of dumping her in some RSPCA centre and walking away from her. She would never get another home. RSPCA would be obliged to tell people why she's there.

Mustn't think about it anymore. Will wait to see what the vet says.