Well, would you adam and eve it? There's me strolling around Leicester Square (as you do), and what has replaced the long-lost Swiss Centre? An M&M shop! I mean, for frack's sake, how can you build a four storey shop out of a packet of M&Ms?
Easily, it seems. M&M keyrings, back-packs, plastic bowls, stuffed toys, anything but a packet of bloody M&M's! I mean, you can get them loose from big dispensers, at two quid a time! But no blue or yellow packets like from the Co-op.
Got two bags for the kids, but my mate declined, saying he was getting some from his corner shop at a fraction of the price.
I mean, what a tacky place! The Swiss Centre was of this calibre too, I admit. But a nice class of tack! Seventies sort of tack. I mean it was a pretty pointless sort of place, with that stupid clock outside and their extraordinarily expensive cheese. Plus the one cup of coffee I had in there. But it was like a reassuring sort of establishment, and a great meeting venue (when I had a life!). And compared to the M&M shop, it's almost a focal point of one's existence.
Oh, and another thing, the music was so loud in there! When the lady at the counter asked what I thought of their new shop, I told her the music was up too high. She said: "Pardon?". I rest my case.
But then it's not for people like me, I suppose. It's for Son and Daughter, all willing to spend their money on shit! The Swiss Centre was for people like me, sigh!
Nearly time for the Woman's Hour drama. Joanna Trollope! Better go