Wednesday, 8 April 2009


Well, Fatso may be disillusioned with show business but not as disillusioned as I am about bloody houses.

Go to see one, don't we, last Saturday. Fall in love with it. And i mean head over heels, loss of appetite, everything. Husband too. Puts in an offer. They say No, higher offer been made. They contact us again. Could you "up it" slightly? Husband goes in there today to see one of their wiz-kid mortgage brokers. Enormously high mortgage. I tell him to say Frack off. He tells me to borrow money off my mother. My newly widowed, will-benefiting mother. I still say Frack off. There's cheaper houses.

How did i get into this? Less than a week ago, I was blissfully unaware of enticing houses, my only worry being how to taunt Fatso. Now, I feel the world is on my shoulders. How the Frack do i ask my Mum for money? I mean she's lent me money for fags before and that.... but this is so much more sinister.

When our offer was initially turned down, we went to see another house to lift our spirits. Well, it did in a perverse sort of way. What a load of old shit! £412,000 for some mid-terraced 50's house - all open plan and a recording studio upstairs! - those poor neighbours! You can build up in the loft, the estate agent says cheerfully. Oh I mean, thats alright then isn't it. I was worried there!

I mean does the Credit Crunch not apply to Twickenham then? They're still free to take the piss house-wise?

Estate agents emailed another house to us. Looked lovely. A chalet style thing with lots of character and room inside. Husband said he wouldn't dream of living in that "shit area".
He can be such a snob sometimes.


Maternal Tales said...

Hang on in there. The 'higher offer' may not be able to proceed, it may fall through, etc. If you stand firm they may come back to you. Stranger things have happened!

French Fancy said...

don't get me started on UK house prices. I sometimes google the street that I grew up in and I just can't believe how much these mock tudor houses are going for these days.

It is so different out here in this bit of France. Now the Brit invasion has gone houses are valued at a true price and you can get something lovely for about 140k.

Oh Jen - if only you could be our neighbour - I might even take up smoking again.

Suburbia said...

And 'room inside'?!!! Only 1 Jen? Gosh, London is overpriced!

Hope you are ok otherwise. Thanks for your best wishes. Happy Easter to you too :-)

S x

Mean Mom said...

Commiserations! It all sounds like a bit of a nightmare. I absolutely dread having to move house again. We've lived in this house for 22 years, but it will be too big for us, when my other 2 lads move out. Hope something good happens for you. I don't suppose that there's too much on the market at the moment?

Jennysmith said...

Thank you, my chums, for your loving and supportive comments.

Pleased to meet you, MT, i don't think we've encountered each other before. Thanks for visiting. And yes, you predicted right, the higher offer was "flakey" as the agents put it and we've been accepted!

Gosh, FF, 140 K, do you know how tempting it is to get on that ferry or train now? I remember Twickenham being those prices when i first moved here in '95.

Yes, Sub sweetie, outrageously priced. But i've heard Bristol and the south west generally is getting very expensive now. Whatever, you're better off there. (wish you were in London tho' for selfish reasons!)

Hi MMM, hope you're having at least a quieter Easter after all you've been through. Must be sad when children leave the family home. Or is it? Are you glad they;ve flown by then? Thank you for your good wishes.


The Dotterel said...

Woo, hoo! When's the housewarming?

The Dotterel said...

PS: Is Fatso invited?

Polly said...

So you got the house? I am so very excited for you - crack open the champas! I bet you are thrilled.

Marie and John said...

I do feel for you Jenny, I really do.

It must be so heartbreaking to fall in love with a house then find the greedy owners want to bleed you dry.

I agree with Maternal Tales (hello by the way...). In these uncertain times the higher offer people might not sell their home or even be able to get a mortgage.

Fingers and toes crossed for you...