Wednesday, 1 April 2009

The Real World

Have had to spend time in the real world this week. Didn't like it much.

Went to go into Coffee Republic and some chunky kid closed the door in my face.
"Thanks Chubs", I mumbled to him as I re-opened it.
South Park are quite right. The fattest kids are indeed the meanest.

The posh woman he was with succumbed to his whinging for a cheese sandwich and then
demanded a receipt for it. I bet if that had been her own money,
he would have had to bloody well wait till he got home.

There was also a mean kid in the chip shop. Well, he whinged a bit anyway. And his mum was
telling him he had to share his chips with his sister.

I smiled nicely at the little..... boy. I conveyed my thoughts to him:

"When i was your age, i never had to share anything. I had chips all to myself. And sweets
and ice cream, I could eat it all by myself. And i was a lot poorer than you. All your life, you'll
grow up with tight-lipped people and will have to share everything. You'll never knew the pleasure of a full plate!"

His face screwed up and went red. I think i have ESP.

Why am i being so mean to kids suddenly? My own child is only 10 - it wasn't even that long ago for me. And here i am waging a war on them.

Still scarred from my encounter with the old woman last week, I watched warily as a senior citizen stood behind me in the M&S queue. With one item in her hand. Well, what could I do? The poor cow. I asked her if she wanted to go in front of my unashamedly extravagent and full basket. Of course then I was stuck making conversation with her, wasn't I. She asked if I knew if a certain restaurant was still open in Hampton Wick. She'd been there 25 years ago and it was very good. Well, I mean, bless her. I wouldn't know a restaurant if it lived next door to me! And then, just before she got scanned, she leaned up to me confidentially:
"Don't ever get old," she breathed, "its horrible!"

So I'm not old yet? Not according to her I wasn't. A smile spread across my face. My young face. What was I saying about old people? That they were the best? Bless her heart. She can go in front of me anytime. Even if she had two trolleys!


Dave Pie-n-Mash said...

Nice job on the fat kid. ESP comes invery handy at times!

Marie and John said...

I don't have ESP but I do give them a 'look' which works.

One of these days the delightful little darlings parent will bring me up for terrifying their sprogs...

I'm always weary of letting the 'one item' person who's behind me at the check-out go first. They usually forget something so sauunter off to get it and return 10 minutes later, or there's a problem with their item.

I'm afraid sods law always applies to me...


French Fancy said...

I'm glad you let me go in front of you dearie - I meant it when I told you not to get old.

Suburbia said...

I'm not here really I'm cooking tea, so I haven't read your post (will return later) but I did just check my e mails......We ought to meet, London or Bristol would be good. And by the way, I don't think much about me working either!!!! 'see' you after I've cooked childrens tea!

S x

Suburbia said...

OK you have my full attention now!!

What a lovely lady! The sad thing is, old age comes to us all, and from where I'm standing, it does indeed look horrible


Jennysmith said...

Thank you my sweets for your lovely comments.

Perhaps we;ve got ESP in all of us Dave and Marie. and yes, i've been caught out like that - the innocent looking shopper with one item.

FF, don't give me that! You are a lovely young thing.

Sub, yes, yes and yes! Soon as possible! And What work do you do? Are you full time or part time? Am i nosey or what?


Polly said...

Bless her cotton socks. What a lovely old thing.